This is a submission for the 2026 WeCoded Challenge: Echoes of Experience
I stood on stage in front of a nearly full cinema hall that had been con...
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Honestly, the email says more about the sender than about you.
It reads like peak teenage overconfidence mixed with a bit of “internet expert syndrome” — very blunt, very certain, and not exactly subtle.
What stands out is your reaction. You did get hit by it — which is completely normal, especially at 12, when you’re proud of something you built and someone just tears it down. That kind of cold shower can sting.
What matters is that you didn’t stay there. You processed it, stepped back, and kept going. That’s the part a lot of people (even adults) struggle with.
If anything, this kind of moment is almost a rite of passage in tech — running into someone who feels the need to question your legitimacy.
The difference is what you do after. And you clearly turned it into something constructive.
Thanks so much for this, Pascal — I really appreciate your perspective 💜
And you’re absolutely right. The hardest part wasn’t even the email itself, but the fact that it actually killed that spark in me for a while.
What’s funny (and a bit scary) is that I don’t even clearly remember what made me come back to programming. I think it might have been some kind of school competition.
Which just shows how important those small initiatives can be. Sometimes it only takes one opportunity, one nudge at the right moment, to bring someone back on track.
Actually, I don’t think he extinguished your motivation.
He definitely dealt it a blow — but probably less than it felt at the time. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be here talking about it today.
It only took a small spark to bring it back. Like a gentle breeze over embers hidden under the ashes.
And at that point, it’s no longer just a flame — it’s a wildfire. The second ignition is always stronger.
I really like that perspective!
And you know, it actually reminds me of my later school years… and to be honest, it wasn’t all that smooth either. For example, my computer science teacher — a woman — clearly favored the boys 😅
But maybe that’s a story for next year’s contest 😄
That sounds like a sequel already writing itself 😄
Funny how the pattern shifts but the mechanism stays the same — different context, same kind of bias. This time not a blunt email, but something quieter… and arguably more insidious.
In a way, it makes your trajectory even more interesting. It’s one thing to bounce back once — it’s another to keep moving forward when the friction becomes structural.
So yes, I’d definitely read that “next chapter.” Something tells me it wouldn’t just be a story about a teacher.
Exactly, I think that story would be quite an interesting one too! 😄
But well… I guess it will have to wait until next year 😄
This was such a great read, Sylwia. Your description of the dial-up modem ritual took me right back to my own childhood. I can still hear that awful mechanical screeching in my head, not to mention the absolute panic of running up the phone bill. It is funny how universal that experience was. 😂
As for that older nerd who wrote you that terrible email... well, considering how things turned out, I would say he seriously missed out. His loss, our gain. I am really glad you did not let him stop you from building. We definitely need more falling snow on the web anyway.
Haha, exactly — shared experiences of old (sorry… I mean experienced 😄) developers!
And yes, I have no idea why the trend of falling snow in winter disappeared… it clearly deserves a comeback. Although fun fact — on the homepage of the component library I have to use at work, it was actually snowing this winter 😄 so maybe there’s still hope!
That is actually hilarious about your component library at work. Whoever snuck a falling snow effect into a corporate UI library is an absolute legend and deserves a raise. If they add a visitor counter or a spinning flaming logo next year, we know the renaissance has officially started. 😁
Haha, I’ll tell you a secret… nooo, they absolutely do NOT deserve a raise 😄 But I’ll give them this — at least they kept the spirit of the old internet alive just a little bit 😉
Fair enough, your secret is safe with me. I guess forcing some 90s nostalgia into the codebase does not automatically excuse writing terrible code. 😂
But we still have to respect their commitment to the bit. I will cancel the petition for their raise, but they still get a silent nod of approval for the effort. 😉
Bit sad story about perfectionist coder who did not see trought the imperfections, even that is created by you in so young, finally you are here!
Congratulation for the speeaks in Conference.
Thank you so much! 😊
And yes, exactly — when you look at it from today’s perspective, no matter how “ugly” that website might have been, the fact that a 12-year-old built it at all is already a success.
And let’s be honest — the internet has more than enough space for all of it 😉
A story like this brought back some memories for me.
I'm from Ukraine, and I remember the late 90s when I was studying at university. I had no money and no idea how I would ever afford a PC. It felt out of reach. I once told a friend about it, and she shared something that stayed with me.
She said she had been buying CDs even before she had a CD player. Not because she needed them, but because she believed it would bring her closer to the moment when she could actually use them. And eventually, it did. She got the device.
So I started buying computer books. I couldn’t really use them at home, so I just imagined how I would. I read them and pictured myself working on my own computer instead of the university one.
And yes, it worked.
A few years later, I bought my first computer. Then came PHPNuke, my growing interest in PHP, and eventually my work became connected to it.
After the war began, things became harder again. And sometimes it feels like I need something similar to move forward.
Maybe it’s time to start 'collecting computer books' again.
This is such a beautiful comment — thank you so much for sharing it 💜
Reading this also reminded me that, in a way, I was privileged back then. My parents were definitely not wealthy, but the truth is that very few people could afford a computer or even those 15 minutes of internet a day. And yet, I had that chance.
The part about “collecting computer books” is incredibly touching. There’s something so powerful in that kind of belief — investing in a future you can’t fully access yet, but somehow already feel is yours.
I’m really sorry for what you’re going through now. I truly support Ukraine in any way I can, even if it’s small.
And honestly — I think you should consider writing this story down. It’s the kind of story that could inspire a lot of people 💛
I believe it works in a few ways.
On one side, once you’ve spent time and money on something, you’re more likely to choose that path later when you’re deciding between different directions. Just human psychology. :)
On the other side, doing something, anything, makes you familiar with the area. You start seeing opportunities to reach your goals, even when for others it still looks like complete darkness.
A lot of successful people in the indie hackers community (people who run solo online businesses) say it’s not about making things perfect, but about the number of attempts.
Consistency beats perfection.
And maybe “collecting books” is part of the process. Starting with what you can do right now is how you begin to live in your future.
I think you’re absolutely right — there really is something to it 😊
I don’t have a direct “collecting books” kind of experience myself, but one thing I’m 100% sure of from my own life is that consistency works. I’ve seen it over and over again, in different areas.
There were many situations where I honestly felt a bit embarrassed — someone would give 100%, and I was maybe giving 10%. But I kept going consistently for months or even years. And while that other person burned out at some point, I was still there… and eventually got much further.
That said, just so it doesn’t sound like I’ve got it all figured out 😄 — lately I’ve taken on so many of those “small things” that right now I mostly dream about resting and finally finishing them all.
Thankfully, I can already see a bit of light at the end of the tunnel 😊
Great read. Remembering how the phone used to sound when attempting to connect to the internet brings a smile to my face.
I remember how excited I felt waking up to see if my game had completed downloading during the night. It was like christmas.
Haha exactly, the downloading! 😄 These days it takes seconds or maybe a few minutes… back then it felt like it took forever.
Such a powerful and honest story 💜
It’s wild how a single message can almost change someone’s entire path. Thank you for sharing this—it's a reminder to all of us to choose kindness and give feedback that builds, not breaks. Every great developer starts somewhere 🚀...
Thank you so much! Exactly, feedback is incredibly valuable, but it should help people grow, not bring them down. There’s a big difference between constructive feedback and humiliation.
We are often our harshest critics and build endless scenarios in our head of what could go wrong. My remedy to this is simple: just keeping taking action despite the doubts. Over time, you learn to be more comfortable being uncomfortable. The feeling for me never disappears but it gets more manageable.
Thank you for sharing this story Sylwia, I felt transported back to the 90s for a second there and it felt nice!
Thank you so much, Julien , I really appreciate it 😊
And yes, that’s so true! You just have to keep doing things. Action itself is actually calming, in a way.
And about the 90s, I’ve always wondered what it looked like in a more “developed” country back then, like Canada 😄 Today it’s probably quite similar, but in the 90s Poland was still catching up after communism, so there was quite a noticeable gap.
My current location is indeed Canada as per my profile but I actually only moved there a few months ago so it would be hard to answer your question haha
I was born and raised in France in the suburbs of Paris. Things were different back then, some memories include (without revealing my exact age hehe) are of a game boy, playing marbles with friends. Writing with an ink pen and using a chalkboard at school.
Haha, same here! 😄 I also remember things like that, it really feels like a shared experience across countries.
But I have to say, when I visited France around 2005, it felt like a completely different world to me. More developed, more “civilized” in a way.
I haven’t been to France in many years now, but I travel to Brussels quite often (which used to feel like that same “better world” to me), and honestly… now there’s barely any difference.
Or sometimes it even feels like Poland has the advantage 😄 Mostly because some older systems, like paying by check, never really became a thing here, so we jumped straight into modern digital payments everywhere.
That makes a lot of sense. I visited Wrocław in the recent years and was very impressed by the infrastructure. Poland's rapid modernization over the last decades is very impressive.
When I was working in Berlin, many tech companies were seeking developer talent in Poland.
Yes, exactly 😊 And Wrocław actually looks a bit like my city, Gdańsk.
And it’s true, a lot of companies look for developers from Poland. I always joke that it’s because we complain a lot, so we’re really good at spotting problems 😄
Nice!
Oh I didn't know that about Polish. I can relate being French hahaha
Haha Julien are you sure you don't have some polish genes? 🤣
This isn't just a story about coding. It's about every person who ever started something new, only to have someone try to tear them down.
How many future developers end their story right there that line stopped me. Made me think about my own journey, and how one cruel email could have ended it before it even began.
You're absolutely right. There's a huge difference between here's how to improve and 'you shouldn't have started.' The first builds bridges. The second burns them.
And that conference moment? Seeing you on that stage, telling this story, getting that applause that was the ultimate comeback. Not to that boy (who probably doesn't even remember), but to your younger self who needed to hear that she belonged.
Thank you for sharing this. It will give courage to so many beginners who need it.
Thank you so much for this beautiful comment — it truly means a lot to me 💜
And yes… in my case it turned out well in the end, but it really could have gone the other way. That’s what makes it a bit scary when I think about it now.
How many people hear something like “this isn’t for you” at the very beginning — and believe it? And then just… stop.
That’s why I wanted to share this story. Because sometimes the difference between continuing and quitting is much smaller than we think.
Hi Sylwia,
Touching story. Thanks for sharing. And really, this is probably so common, i mean, one gets an email, other hears a very harsh criticism, or fails in front of someone/some people she/he cares and totally feels ashamed, disappointed, discouraged, whatever, which might require years to erase the effect of that feeling.
I think it needs maybe some kind of over-self-confidence, not to be affected easily with these harsh moments BUT, being raised with values like being "humble", not bragging for what we do have, and therefore not showing over-confidence even for all good traits we could have (which is not necessarily bad, of course) can make us vulnerable against these moments.
Well this is... life.
Anyway, it has been too long message but i guess i felt empathy (maybe because of being a father of 2 daughters or perhaps i felt similar feelings deep inside but cannot surface it enough to remember exactly). I am glad you made it thru this (to such a nice career).. And, i must say it is a nice web page, made me feel nostalgia of those times...
Thank you so much for this beautiful comment — I really appreciate it 😊
Exactly, I understand what you mean. I also have two daughters, so I know very well how careful we have to be with things like this.
And you’re absolutely right — we often raise children to be humble, not to brag, to stay modest… and then later in life it turns out they need a certain level of confidence to stand their ground. Not to show off, but simply to believe in themselves.
Thanks again for your thoughtful words — it really means a lot.
Dropping by from South Korea, where some are busy like hell preparing for comeback of the most renowned boy group in the country, BTS. :)
Touching story. I also share experiences similar to some of yours. Big boys doesn't cry, but I can't deny some of my heart becoming wet. Well done, my dear fellow developer.
Considering that,it looks like the life is same across the globe, regardless of the gender. Studying with intrinsic motivation(like...... "just for fun"?), discouraging and disappointing experience, bursting up the inner fire again, and so on and on and on......
Anyway, as developers,
to solve the problems and inconveniences scattered all over the world. And it's great to hear from a fellow with pure inner passion. Well done!
P.S:
Robert Teminian is my pen name. I'm native Korean and have my real Korean name. :)
Thank you so much for your comment 😊
And this is exactly what I love about DEV — being able to connect and talk with people from all over the world.
You’re absolutely right, too. No matter the gender, culture, or where we live, so many of these experiences are surprisingly similar.
Also, I’ve never been to South Korea, but your culture really fascinates me — it must be an amazing place!
And by the way, I honestly thought BTS never really went anywhere — they’re still playing them on the radio here all the time 😄 Although to be fair… these days it’s APT. even more often 😄
아파트 아파트 아파트 아파트🎵 lol
Trivia: I had no chances to play APT games, since I don't drink. :P
Haha I had no idea! 😄 So APT is actually a drinking game too — now it makes even more sense why it’s so catchy 😄
By the way, what do you think about K-pop demon hunters? 😄 Even though I’m way past my teenage years, I absolutely love that vibe and the music — it honestly makes me want to visit Korea someday!
Since I don't subscribe to Netflix I didn't see the entire movie, but considering what I heard from my neighbors and saw from YouTube clips......
If you come to Korea, my wife runs an AirBnB in Seoul, which is a studio apartment with no shared spaces with other guests. I can't say that it's top quality, but it's surely cozy and at home with reasonable pricing, considering patterns of guests - about 50% of guests are European, and about 10~15% are Singaporean guests. I have no idea why there are more foreign guests than Korean native, but yeah, that's that(......).
Haha, I think my favorite is the main one — Rumi, if I remember correctly? 😄
And if you say it really captures the vibe of Seoul, that makes me want to visit even more!
I don’t have any concrete plans yet — no tickets, no dates — but if I ever get myself organized and make it there, I’ll definitely reach out 😄
Who knows… maybe one day someone will invite me to a conference there 👀😄
Great. Let me cross my fingers for you. Until then!
I had a similar moment early on — someone trashed my first project and I almost quit too. Funny thing is, that “bad” project is exactly how most of us learn.
Your point about criticism is so true. A few words can either push someone forward… or stop them completely.
Exactly! 😄 Especially because when you’re building those first projects, you’re not hurting anyone — you’re not forcing it on anyone either.
I didn’t even send that site to him directly — I sent it to my cousin. They were probably just sitting together at the computer when he saw it.
very nice article, Sylwia! thanks for sharing. more please! 🌹💯❤
Awww thanks Aaron 😊💖
Reading about that 'cluttering the internet' email really hit home. I'm literally about to go live with my own portfolio site, and honestly, that fear of whether it’s 'good enough' to post is always there. Seeing how one random gatekeeper's comment almost stopped you is a huge reminder to just hit publish anyway. Really glad you kept going—the web needs more people who actually build things instead of just criticizing them.
Thank you so much for this comment 😊
And definitely — just hit publish! Seriously. That fear never fully goes away, but it shouldn’t stop you from sharing your work.
If my story helped even one person make that decision and go live with their project, then it was absolutely worth writing 💛
When you succeed, even your hardest memories become sweet.
When you fail, all your experiences stay heavy in your heart.
Thanks.
Hmm. That seems subjective. It could entirely depend what the failure is, whether it's a decided failure, and how much of an emotional investment you have in the success.
I fail all the time. I also plan for failure: "This... may not be the thing I need/want."
That’s a very wise perspective, and I completely agree with you 😊
In general, when you try a lot of things, some of them will work out — but naturally, many won’t, and that’s perfectly fine. For example, I submit CFPs to conferences: sometimes I get accepted, sometimes I don’t, and I’m totally okay with that. It’s part of the process.
But in this case, we’re talking about a 12-year-old who didn’t get feedback like “you could improve this” or “here’s what to learn next,” but something much closer to “just delete it.”
And I think that kind of feedback can hit very differently, especially at the beginning.
Definitely. I wouldn't like to say that I was victim blaming, here. Many adults definitely do not perform in the best way. I'm glad you balked at the experience and elevated beyond it. Also, it's good to keep these memories. They're like little sign posts in your brain that you can flip the bird at with actual evidence. 💗
Exactly! 😊
Or sometimes it’s not even about failing — we just give up after getting harsh feedback and start telling ourselves we’re not good enough for something… even though that might not be true at all.
This is why I casually assert that I know everything. How can someone dispute that. They don't know everything.
First, I am so happy that you returned to programming !
Second, I was SO ANGRY reading what he said to you and a memory of when I was around 12 and I made my own website -- I took a chance and decided to share it in an AOL chat room lmao
Whewwww NEVER, EVER again. It did stop me from programming for a long time but it snuck back in during the Myspace age.
Your experience was a perfect of example of why ACTUAL constructive criticism is so important! With his experience he could have said something like, "Great job on your first try! Here is what you can do to improve the website ..." but perhaps I am expecting too much from a teenage boy lol
Thank you SO much for this comment, I really appreciate it! 😄 It really shows how universal that early internet experience was, doesn’t it? 😄
I’m so glad we both found our way back to programming. But yeah… how many people never did? It’s honestly a bit scary to think about.
And that boy was probably one of those early-internet warriors, just like the ones from your AOL chat 😄
The line that cuts: "You can immediately tell it was made by a twelve-year-old." He was right. That was exactly who made it. But he saw the age as a flaw, not a signal. The difference between someone who builds and someone who criticizes is often just whether they remember what it felt like to not know yet.
Exactly! 😄 Of course the site was terrible, no question about that. But the internet looked very different back then, and honestly, it didn’t stand out that much from everything else that was out there at the time 😄
The internet needs more websites with snow in winter and falling leaves in autumn!
Unfortunately discouraging others is a defense mechanism used oftenly by insecure people. Sometimes they don't even notice they're doing it. I'm glad you persevered! Your articles bring joy to my Sunday lunches! 😁
I love that “Sunday lunches” part, it honestly made my day 😄
I actually have something similar myself. There’s a podcast I always listen to while hanging laundry, and I remember how weirdly sad it felt when they paused it for a few weeks 😄
And as for that boy… I have no idea what was going through his mind. I like to think he was just one of those early-internet warriors 😄
"This is a total trip down memory lane. I had a similar 'lightbulb moment' with the web back in the early-90s. I built a site dedicated to Snow White, and looking back at this archived version from 1997—complete with frames!—it’s amazing how far we’ve come.
[Link] : web.archive.org/web/19971024223045...
That first feeling of getting an international email from a reader is something I’ll never forget.
Exactly! 😄 Back then frames felt like the ultimate, cutting-edge achievement of frontend — like you had truly made it once you figured them out.
And I love the Snow White theme, that’s such a great idea 😄 There’s something really special about those early personal sites.
This was a great read, thank you for sharing :) It's too bad you didnt have AI reading and responding to your emails back then, it might have saved some grief... but I believe, and have experienced myself, there are usually lessons learned in the resilience and strength in getting back up and getting back in the arena! Those are the things you cant learn in a book or at school :)
Thanks, Evan, really appreciate it 😊 And you’re absolutely right, there will always be someone who questions you along the way. And when you’re a blonde woman in a pretty male-dominated world, sometimes you feel like you have to prove yourself twice from the very start 😄
You’re way ahead of that guy. 😀
Thanks! 😊 And to be honest… I don’t really know that. I never stayed in touch with him.
I know he went on to study computer science at a good university, but as we all know, even that isn’t a guaranteed indicator of how things turn out later.
It really isn’t!
I take that email as the challenge or big question your resilience responded positively to.
I love your posts.
Thank you so much for your kind words — I really appreciate it 😊
To be fair it is pretty poor... just joking ! I would have loved to be able to create something so nice at that age!
Haha, I was waiting for a comment like this 😄😄 And to be fair, back then all websites looked like that, so it didn’t really stand out in any way, neither better nor worse 😄
I love the way you handled your own emotions and just kept going. If I were in your shoes back then, I probably would've crumbled. You have a better resolve for a kid back then!
Thank you so much! 😊
To be honest, I don’t even know how I managed to come back to programming. I think in the end… the passion just won 😊
Wonderful article
Thanks a million 😊💖
Yes, dial-up was costly. I'm grateful to my parents for providing us with those facilities.
Exactly! 😊 They really supported our passion.
I still remember hearing things like “you’ll never make money just sitting at a computer”… and yet here we are 😄
thanks
🫠💖